1. Pole to Pole

There are some people you expect to see down the job centre. Like the crazy bloke from next door who plays bongos through the night.

But Michael Schumacher?

The Formula One champ (above right) has been forced to register himself as unemployed.

Schumacher owns a home in Switzerland, but is unable to practice his profession there because of the country's strict car racing laws.

But what a stroke of luck! It turns out Schuey's unemployed status means he only has to pay 20% tax on his annual rent of £170,000 - a saving of 15%. Every cloud…

2. Suicidal blonde?

Accidentally choosing first gear instead of reverse, forgetting to indicate, driving round a roundabout fourteen times - we've all made mistakes.

But when you drive your vehicle into a lake, it's time to think long and hard about the best use of your skill set.

A woman says she suffered a 'blonde moment' when she drove her Land Rover Freelander into a lake at Sale Water Park in Manchester.

The woman (above right), who wishes to remain anonymous (wouldn't you?), was spotted banging on the window for help.

Seconds later the dizzy driver climbed out of the back window and was rescued by watersports instructors in a speedboat.

"One minute I was parking, the next I was in the water," said the woman.

"I'd had a really busy day."

The Auto Trader team is now clearing their collective diaries to avoid this little-known by-product of "being busy".

3. Puss in boot

Well, under the bonnet to be precise.

A cat has used up one of its nine lives by travelling 262 miles under the bonnet of a car.

Aslan's adventures began after he curled up to take a nap inside owner Hannah Fisher's neighbour's car.

And he went unnoticed by driver Rob Hollier who made the journey from his Ipswich home to Maestag, Mid Glamorgan oblivious to his uninvited stowaway.

Rob discovered Aslan when the hungry puss began mewing the next morning.

"There was not a scratch on him. We couldn't believe it," said Mr Hillier.

Aslan has now been reunited with his relieved owner.

4. Intruder alert

Volvo has installed the ultimate paranoia device in its new S80 sedan (right).

The personal car communicator (PCC) detects the heartbeat of anyone hiding in your motor.

The device is meant to provide protection against carjacking.
  

If the gadget detects someone inside alerts the owner by activating a key fob alarm - hopefully before they've got in the car.

But quite how the carjacker is supposed to get into the car without setting off the alarm, I don't know.